I’ve just completed my first full week of teaching. I observed classes for a week, and then taught a few classes last week. Here’re a few funny things that’ve happened so far:
1) I have a student named Jacky. He’s 7. He’s extremely smart and very friendly. On Monday we had this conversation:
Jacky: “Teacher Newley?”
Me: “Yes, Jacky?”
J: “You have a big nose.”
M: “Ha, ha.”
J: “People with big noses has many monies. In Chinese, we say people with big noses has many monies.”
M: “Ha, ha. You mean they’re rich?”
J: “Yes. It is good to have a big nose.”
M: “Thank you, Jacky.”
2) When I first started teaching, I sat in on a colleage’s class. When I introduced myself to the students, a 10-year-old kid named Dinosaur told me I look like an Indian. (The students here choose their own English names when they begin studying the language. Dinosaur, apparently, has a thing for the Jurassic period.) The exchange went like this:
Dinosaur: “Teacher, you look like an Indian.”
Me: “Really?”
D: “Yes, you look like an Indian. With your hair and your face.”
Me: “You think so?”
D: “Yes, you look like an Indian.”
Me: “Oh. Hmm.”
(I have long dark hair and I have to admit I do look a little like a Native American.)
3) On Monday, one of my students peed his pants during class. His name’s Ken. He’s only 4, so I wasn’t mad. I was just happy I didn’t have to clean it up. I left that to one of our Chinese secretaries.
I’d just dismissed the class, and was walking around the room pushing in the chairs. I noticed some clear liquid beneath Ken’s desk. I froze. I scrutinized the liquid. It dawned on me that it wasn’t water.
I turned around and looked toward the door, and one of our Chinese secretaries was holding Ken’s hand and looking at me. They were both smiling. “It’s okay,” said the secretary. “It’s okay.”
“He didn’t ask to go the bathroom or anything,” I said. “It’s okay,” she said. Ken was looking at me and grinning. I left the room quickly.